Tuesday, March 15, 2011

Late to the party

Don't roll up the red carpet just yet. As usual I'm way late, but now I'm here, so let's get this party started-er, keep it going. You know what I mean.

I'm so excited. I won't lie, I love winning stuff.

Thank you much to Lisa at 17 Forever, TwiKiwi50 at TwiKiwi and Chloe Cougar at Inspired by Lemons for picking The Inappropriate Crush for this award. *MWAH*

(Side note: I'd like to send another shout out to Lisa for creating my amazing blog banner. See it? Isn't it delectable?! I love to stare at it. A lot!)

OK, back to the award...
 Award Rules

To accept this award one must follow the rules.
1. Thank the person that gave it to you and link it back to their blog.
2. Post 7 random facts about yourself.
3. Pass the award on to 15 other blogs.

Random facts about Smitten...
  1. My sisters wanted a brother, so they nicknamed me Chuck.
  2. I was an exchange student in HS and spent a semester in Germany.
  3. My daughter was born upstairs in my bedroom. On purpose.
  4. I took a chair to the head during a bar fight and had to get 10 stitches to the side of my head/in my ear. (it's less interesting if I add that I was minding my own business drinking when chairs started swinging)
  5. Still water. At room temperature.
  6. I don't own any wireless devices except a cell phone. And a really old mp3 player that is collecting dust. Sad panda.
  7. Robert Pattinson's sex appeal is so powerful that I believe his birth triggered my menses. #trufax
I think most of you have received this award already, but maybe not all of you. And if you aren't on this list, sorry, I swear I love you!

  1. RobzSinger
  2. Tongue-Twied
  3. Borderline Phenomenal
  4. I'm Allergic to Robert Pattinson
  5. Memoirs of a Robmance
  6. Walk with Mrs. P
  7. The Culinary Curser
  8. Living with Edward
  9. Cheaper than Therapy
  10. It's Whine Thirty
  11. My DiscomROBulation
  12. Inotu - Diary of a Mid-life Crisis One Word at a Time
  13. Trixie and Tess
  14. Chronicles of a Fat Girl Named Miss Tejota
  15. cul-de-sac-ed
Now, how about some other award show greatness?


Monday, February 21, 2011

Twilight: I poke fun because I love

For me, the fun of the Twilight movies doesn’t come only from the story or the cast, it’s in the little details.  The details that make me smile, and the ones that I love to hate. I’m not talking about the fugly wigs and bad costumes (though god knows, the movies certainly have their share of those) or even the scenes that Melissa Rosenberg and Cougar Cathy destroyed or left out altogether.  I’m talking about the strange little things that make me say “What the?” “Are you kidding me?” or “Did you even read the book?”

Basically, this is my WTF list for Twilight*.

*I reserve the right to add to this list at any time.

The Kid in the Gym
Unknown child in gym class

On Bella’s first day at Forks HS, who is the kid running around in the gym, and why? Seriously, go check it out if you don't believe me. I'll wait.

See, I told you!  If anyone can shed some light on this, I’d really appreciate it!

 Emmett's eggs
what's with the bag of eggs Emmett?

In general, I don’t like how much Cougar Cathy continuously showed the Cullen’s pretending to eat while in the cafeteria. But mostly I just wonder about the bag of boiled eggs Emmet is carrying in the “first sight” scene.

The Ketchup Bottle 
What exactly is she doing?
This makes me fear for the Precious’ glorious p33n!!!

Hey, did you get contacts?
Edward's bum. Sweet.

While I giggle at Edward getting all uncomfortable and flustered, and ultimately walking away when Bella asks him about his eyes, this is something that Edward Cullen just wouldn’t do.  Ever!

But I won't complain too hard, since I get to watch Edward's bum walking away. SIGH.

Flashback meal 
Um, the clothes are very entertaining and all, but why are all four of you sharing a deer?
Anyone? Anyone?

I. Just. Don’t. Get. It.

It's Time
If timing is everything, then you fail.

Apparently Melissa Rosenberg and Cougar Cathy think we are all too stupid to understand what “seeing the future” means, and thus has included “it’s time” AFTER the lightening and subsequent clap of thunder.

 Victoria at the Prom
What. The. Fuck.

This is my biggest WTF moment of the whole series thus far. WHY THE FUCK IS VICTORIA AT THE PROM? 

Someone, Melissa or Cathy, or both, obviously failed Twilight 101. Where we all  learned about the amazing senses vampires have.

And our lovely Edward is equipped with even more than the average, he can read minds.  If Victoria were there then Edward would hear her and smell her.  Hell, even if she had been there earlier but had already left, he would still smell her.  Yet there she is at the punch table, in her ugly furry coat-wrap-whatever-thingy. FAIL!!!

Yet even with all that. I FLOVE Twilight. Unconditionally and irrevocably.

Here are just a few of the reasons why. Or the one reason. Whatever.

Friday, January 28, 2011

Perving is contagious

Ok, I already knew this. I can perv on Rob all by myself (I'm talented like that), but put me with a group of like-minded h00rs *ohai twitter* and the perviness factor grows. Hard.

But what I only discovered recently is this: Once you start perving on one 20-something guy, you start noticing all the other not-as-hot-but-still-hot 20-something guys out there!!

Obviously it started with this:

Which let to this:

And then this:

Were boys this hot when I was in my 20's? I don't think so. I certainly don't remember that. I had the prerequisite Leonardo DiCapprio obsession during the Titanic days, but let's be honest, Leo was never this hot.

Recently though, I find myself seeing more of the men outside of my little Twilight bubble.  It's like Twilight opened my eyes.

Or maybe it just made me really horny.

Now I see great guys everywhere. Cute, handsome and funny guys like this (I know, some of those guys aren't in their 20's, but I didn't realize that til I was in the middle of the post, so tough!):

And to be fair to the men in my own age-bracket, they are plenty hot too!

Granted, the perv factor is nowhere near that of the Precious, but still; I enjoy the eye candy!

Lately though..... well, I've been cheating. A LOT!!!  Obviously Rob still holds first place, but number 2 climbed the list with record speed. And he isn't going to give up his quest for top spot. 

Ladies, I'd like you to meet Charlie Hunnam.

I first discovered Charlie playing pretty boy Lloyd on the short-lived but awesome sitcom Undeclared. He was also on Queer as Folk, which unfortunately is on my "always wanted to watch but never did" list. And now, he plays Jax (Jackson) Teller on the FX show Sons of Anarchy. I love SOA. FLOVE IT!! It's an amazing show with a fantastic cast. Katey Sagal just won a Golden Globe for her role as Jax's mom Gemma.  Have you seen it? Well, what are you waiting for?  Need motivation? I can provide that. 

Need more? Well h00rs here it is: Charlie isn't shy about showing off his body. Jax frequently appears au natural. Many an episode finds me ogling Jax's fine nekkid ass. His chest, back and legs are amazing too (though, try as I might, I didn't get a glimpse of anything else).  Trust me, it's worth looking, you'll agree once you've seen him! Unfortunately google didn't cooperate in my search for an image, no matter how many euphamisms I used for ass, but I'll share this in hopes it entices you enough.

So there you have it. Not only am I a h00r, but I'm a cheating h00r. And I refuse to feel guilty about it. I have to share Rob with a bazillion others, the least he can do is share me with one. 

And now I'll share some a few of my favourite candids of Rob. Y'know, so you don't kick me out of the club! 

Until next time h00rs... Keep on pervin'!

Update: Sorry about the weird spacing. Blogger is not cooperating.